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Vowentines Day

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January 28, 2013

Since Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, I wanted to take a moment to introduce yall to a fun event some friends of ours are hosting to celebrate the vows we made when we got married and take time to “renew” them now that we’ve walked down the “marriage journey” a little bit.

The question Marie and Mark posed us to answer was this: When have you stuck around (like you promised you would on your wedding day) for worse? For sicker? For poorer? 
I thought it would be fun to participate and of course divulge a little bit about our life. Remember when I said it’s not all rainbows and sunshine?

Let me venture back a bit to when we first had Caroline…times were tough. We were both physically and mentally exhausted-drained from no sleep, crazy because she had colic and cried all the time during the evening hours, weren’t having time together as the couple we used to know…and I remember thinking to myself “is this what we signed up for”? 
Marriage is hard work, it’s a constant struggle and we have issues just like everyone else. For me, I thought having a baby would be the icing on the cake, and would make life perfect, but in those first few weeks and months, we fought a lot. We fought about stupid stuff…washing bottles, who had to get up for those middle of the night feedings, changing the “blowout” diapers, the normal parenting stuff. I thought our so-called “normal life” had gone down the drain and I assumed it would be like that forever…just one argument or disagreement after another and I was scared I would never get back to our “happy place”. 

But just like that, things changed…we started getting into a routine, we learned to communicate better, and we focused on parenting as a team effort, not a battle we needed to fight alone. To be honest, it helped talking to other friends and family members who had gone through similar struggles, too… it relieved me to know we weren’t crazy, and that stuff like that TOTALLY happens when you have a baby and you’ve got balls flying around everywhere.
We are lucky in that Jeff and I know that no matter what happens, we’re in this together. Through the good times AND the bad, we made vows to one another to honor each other the rest of our lives and that isn’t something either of us take lightly. We have learned to communicate better and to focus on our family first. And a lot of that is because of Marie and Mark, AKA Nashville Marriage Studio. They have been a saving grace to us…a way for us to honestly talk about our issues, our strengths and weaknesses, and what works for us as a couple. I can’t thank them enough!
With that, I wanted to tell y’all about an event they are hosting on 2.16.13 here in Nashville. It’s called Vowentines and it’s an evening for young couples to renew their vows no matter how long ago they were first said. You’ll get a chance to celebrate your journey since you said “I do”. Here is a link to their site with all the details. 

  1. genevieve says:

    This is AWESOME. And your honesty is so appreciated. I only wish this workshop was offered where we live. Maybe we'll have to have our own little 'vowentines day' 🙂 xo

  2. Katie says:

    What a wonderful idea! wish we had something like this in CT! I agree we might have to have our own vowentines at home!
    http://dreaminginlace.blogspot.com

    xoxo
    Katie

  3. Nicole-Lynn says:

    I love the idea of a vow renewal, how sweet is that! My husband and I are planning to renew ours for our 3rd anniversary since it's our lucky # 🙂

    It's not very often that I hear how much of a toll having a baby can be on a relationship. Thank you for your honesty!

  4. Tess says:

    Thanks for sharing this. No marriage is perfect, but as I embark on mine, I want it to be as close to perfect as possible – which is a FAR cry from reality, I am sure.

    I do think that engaging in these types of conversations and looking at your relationship as one whole, over two separate parts, is super important.

    And hopefully with baby #2 you and Jeff will have worked out some of the kinks and dominate the first few months!!

  5. Caroline says:

    love your honesty!!!

  6. Jess Norden says:

    I am SO GLAD you wrote about this…it's easy to think that you are the only one going through this, but you're not!! Chad and I had MANY bumps when Cameron was first born and it was devastating to think that having a baby didn't bring us CLOSER, it separated us more – both physically because we would sleep at different times and in different places, but also emotionally because we were both SO TIRED. But, we, too, learned to communicate and I have never been happier to have our family together!!

    Thank you for your honesty and talking about this…A lot of people talk about post-pardum depression, but I think this is just as important!

  7. Allyce says:

    I can totally relate to this challenging time in marriage when our baby first came. Lot's of new stuff to deal with! Also, I wish we were having this where we live. I agree with the first comment in that maybe we will have to create a special time for this ourselves! You are such an inspiration in your positive outlook on life that I always appreciate reading along with.

  8. Marie says:

    Natasha, thanks so much for spreading the news about Vowentines 🙂 You and Jeff are such a great couple and we're so thankful to know you guys!

  9. I really admire you for sharing some of the "truths of marriage." No marriage is perfect and it sounds like the Marriage Studio and Vowentines is a great resource. I now want to see if DC has something similar, thanks for sharing!

  10. Such a great post Natasha!! & I agree with Jess! This is just as important as PPD! No one talks about it!

    I wanted to do a similar post for Marie.. but you know.. I don't do much blogging these days! Sounds good – but I'm awful! 🙂

    Love this!!!!

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