When you blog, you let people-mostly strangers nonetheless-take a peak into your daily life. It’s funny how this whole blogging thing started for me almost 5 years ago…I wanted to document my life, when I was single living in the city, bouncing around town with all my friends…bla bla bla. Funny how it’s transformed and how I still use it as a way to document things going on around me and then throw in some fashion for fun, or some tasty recipes because it’s nice to share the good ones, but then as your blog grows and evolves and you gain readership, it’s like the door is opened for harsh criticism and “mean girls” to say hurtful things about you and you’re supposed to sit there, delete it, and move on.
I have taken that route when I’ve received some nasty mail in the past, but this time, I’m standing up for myself…I’m not going to let one negative person get me down and say things that simply aren’t true.
I opened the blog up for a little Q&A session last week, and I received some interesting, and yet very personal questions. Honestly, I didn’t think I’d receive some of the questions I did, but I have been trying my best to be open and honest in everything I said when I answered what my readers wanted to know… maybe that is where I went wrong.
Yesterday morning, I received a rather rude comment from a reader, so after much thinking, I decided that it was time to respond in my own words:
To my commenter Amanda… I would have loved the opportunity to respond to your nastygram personally, though since you have a private profile with no linked email address, I have taken it upon myself to do so here. First of all, I do believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion…this is America after all and we have the freedom to say as we please. However, if I have offended you and you don’t feel as though I am “real”, then why read MY blog at all? I’m fine if you simply delete me from the list of blogs you read if you find no relevance from what I post…I suppose that would be the adult thing to do rather than to bash someone you really don’t know on the internet.
In answering some of what you mention in your comment, saying I “have money” just isn’t so. I started my career right out of college and worked my way up the marketing department at the firm I was employed with so that I could make more money…a lesson I was taught by my parents. I have dealt with financial struggles in the past-working to pay off my college loans, making monthly payments on credit cards to finally have them paid off, learning what it’s like to live off the $20 I have in my checking account, etc. My mom and dad instilled hard work and dedication in me from an early age and I have had a job since the day I turned 16, even working part-time through high school and college. I wasn’t brought up with money, I came from an average, hard-working middle class family–I was just taught how to work with what God gave me and do the best I could.
As for the struggles of most families/SAHMs, is there a “normal” when it comes to what we face? Every single person is different and we all struggle in one way or another, whether that be with money, self confidence, weight, abuse, etc…I have mentioned our struggles on my blog before and I don’t try to pretend like Jeff and I have the perfect marriage/house/etc. I know I am not the perfect mother, nor will I ever be..I’ll probably fail on more occasions than I care to think about, but if my children are happy and are good people, then I think I will have succeeded. Aren’t we all trying to live the best version of our lives?
I’m sorry if you think I “boast” about my life… I was simply answering questions that others asked me, and I was trying to be upfront and honest. People inquired about the house we are planning to build, so I answered-I had no idea that would be considered “boastful”. Jeff did go to private school growing up, whereas I went to a public school…and part of the reason we are hoping to build a home is so that we CAN live in an area where we are able to send our girls to a public school and take advantage of all these incredible teachers-is that so wrong?
Saying I am like a “Desperate Housewife of Nashville”…wow, you’ve got it all wrong my dear. Rarely do I leave the house on with makeup on during the week, I usually have on workout clothes, and Caroline is usually the “loud/wild child” when we are in public. Saying “how I spend my husbands’ money”…well, in my marriage it’s not considered his versus mine, but OURS. That is something our pastor instilled in us when we went through premarital counseling. I don’t try to cash in on some blogger payroll and items/companies that I promote are ones that I stand behind-not because I am trying to make money. If you see where I shop, you’ll notice it’s at places like Gap, Target, Old Navy, Forever 21, etc. I don’t buy $200 dresses for “everyday” looks-that’s just not my style, nor my budget.
If you like these other blogs that offer “real advice” on finances, decorating, being a SAHM, then by all means, please read them and not mine.
Saying you’ll “save my prayers for the families that really need it, not some fortunate Nashvillian with a false sense of reality”…well, honestly, I don’t think I would want your prayers, Amanda, but I assure you I’ll be praying for you. Obviously you need it more than I do.
To everyone out there that reached out to me after this instance, I appreciate your kind words more than you know…it’s hard putting yourself out there, only to be criticized by strangers who think they know you. I try to be myself 100% of the time, and show how my life really is…I’ve said it before, but it’s not all rainbows and sunshine and I don’t pretend to live a life other than the one God gave me. I hope I didn’t offend others out there, and if I did, I am truly sorry. I’m done for today, friends. I think it’s time to spend some time with Caroline and Jeff and not think about the few who try to belittle and hurt others. I wish yall a happy weekend.